How To Become a Massive Person of Influence

I have learned that if you aim to be an influential leader you have to give up the right to complain down. 

Think about it, no one wants to be led by a complainer. 

You simply cannot lead and whine at the same time. 

For example, as a principal, you cannot complain in front of employees about other employees. You’ve not only modeled poor leadership but you’ve also made it alright for your employees to do the same. 

As a teacher, you cannot complain about other teachers to parents in front of your students. You’ve now decreased your peer’s credibility and in the meantime, lost some yourself. 

As a parent you cannot complain about your school, your principal, your child’s teacher in front of your child. This has now given your child the right to do the same. To not follow rules or respect teachers or classmates.

When I was a special education teacher I had a GIANT EGO. I thought I knew it all. Mainly because I was very productive and a strong member of the team. Well at least I thought so.

I was a Nationally Board Certified special education teacher and working towards my Master’s. I was on the student support team in charge of interventions. I was well known in the District by my superiors in the central office. 

Annually I was applying for higher level support positions in the District. I would make it to the final round, only to get the “Thank you for applying” email “we went with another candidate”.

I became angry and frustrated with the process.

I blamed the system. I blamed my current boss. I blamed the application team.

Not once did I stop and ask, what role did I have in this problem.

Eventually I left the school district to work in a charter school. It was a lateral position but they painted me in the picture of their exciting future. “You could be our Special Education Director when we expand next year.” 

I accepted that job. I later became a principal there. Got my Doctorate degree and was recruited by the North Carolina Department of Public Instruction.

I gained credential after credential. I worked hard, I was in charge of Statewide initiatives. I was the consultant that most school leaders called and requested because:

1. I always answered the call.
2. I always had an answer!

But something was missing.

I was all of a sudden being passed over for opportunities. I wasn’t being invited into critical meetings. I was having roles taken off of my plate. It was explained that we had to balance the work and you no longer needed to lead all of these initiatives.

I became angry. I became frustrated. I left that job. 

Not once did I ever look in the mirror and ask, what role do you have in this problem.

I wasn’t until I joined the John Maxwell Team and started to be mentored by John and study leadership did I begin to understand that LEADERSHIP IS NOT A POSITION OR TITLE. 

Leadership is influence, nothing more and nothing less. 

That people will not go along with you until they get along with you. 

You see I may have had the position. And I may have been productive. But I never took the time to build the rapport, the relationships and GAIN THE PERMISSION of my peers, colleagues and subordinates to truly lead them.

The first step to becoming a person of massive influence is is to lead yourself at the highest level. 

Because people DO WHAT PEOPLE SEE, not what they say. 

To lead yourself well, begin by taking inventory of these key personal characteristics listed below rate each one on a 1-10 scale. Or ask a trusted colleague to do so.

Then create a plan to grow yourself in each that is less than an 8, starting with the lowest.

Character - Who you are.

Relationships - Who you know.

Knowledge - What you know.

Intuition - What you feel. 

Experience - Where you have been.

Past Success - What you have done.

Ability - What can you do. 

This LOW SCORE MIGHT BE THE ONE AREA that needs to change for you to gain permission to lead others. 

This low score might also be the reason you are not getting that promotion.  

For me, that area was character. Once I began working on me, studying and living out Maxwell’s leadership principles and core values, an abundance of personal and professional advancement and influence opportunities came my way.

I traveled across the world teaching leadership. 

I coach, equip, mentor and consult for hundreds of school leaders monthly.

I have doubled my income and become debt free.

I have a loving and solid relationship with my wife and two children.

I own a successful business that is starting its eighth year making a difference. 

I don’t share these to impress you. I share them to impress upon you that there is a lid on our capacity. Sometimes it is obvious to the people around us, but we do not see it. This is where the power of reflection and coaching can make the unknown a known. It can raise your awareness so you can make that change. 

So, how about you?

Where do you need to start? 

How will begin you improve your ability to influence others?

 What areas of your life are NOT as successful as you would like them?

Complete the growth exercise and email me ([email protected]). 

Rate yourself on a scale of 1 (low) to 10 (high) for each of those seven characteristics of a person of massive influence.

I would love to help you unlock your potential and create a plan to develop those characteristics which you rated with a low score.

Raising your awareness,

Dr. Tom