Assumptive Leadership: The Silent Killer of School Culture
By Dr. Tom Miller
When school leaders come to me feeling stuck—burned out, frustrated, or unsure why their team isn’t delivering—I often ask one question:
“Where might you be leading from assumption instead of intention?”
It’s a game-changer.
Because here’s the truth: assumptive leadership is everywhere, and it’s silently destroying school culture, team morale, and leadership effectiveness.
What is Assumptive Leadership?
It’s when we assume our staff knows what to do—because they were hired, because they have experience, or because we told them once.
We assume:
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They’re good at what we’re good at.
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They’re motivated by what motivates us.
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They see the school the way we see it.
But they don’t.
And when we lead from assumption, the fallout is real: misalignment, miscommunication, unmet expectations, and a culture of frustration.
I’ve Been There
When I was a principal, I’d spend hours reading articles and curating resources on school leadership and improvement. I’d get so excited to share them with my team.
I’d send out a long email filled with links, insights, and energy.
And then... nothing.
Crickets.
Sometimes the email wasn’t even opened.
I assumed they’d be just as energized as I was.
I assumed they’d see how this fit into our vision.
But I never asked what they needed.
I never listened deeply enough to what they valued.
The Cost of Assumptions
When we lead from assumption:
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We put people in roles that don’t align with their strengths.
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We create expectations they don’t even know exist.
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We lose trust without realizing it.
Assumptions create distance between you and your team. And the longer you let them linger, the deeper the cracks in your foundation.
Lead by Asking, Not Assuming
Want to break free from assumptive leadership? Start by leading with questions:
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What are your strengths—and how can we build on them?
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What gives you energy at work? What drains you?
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How do you see your role in our school’s vision?
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What do you need more of (or less of) to thrive?
Leadership is about alignment.
Alignment comes from understanding.
Understanding starts with listening.
A Better Way: The GROOW Coaching Model
In our upcoming workshop, I’m teaching the GROOW Coaching Model—a simple, powerful framework for school leaders who want to lead through conversation, not just direction.
This model will help you:
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Ask better questions
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Coach with clarity
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Identify hidden assumptions
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Build a team culture grounded in strengths and shared vision
If you're tired of running in circles with your team, of carrying the whole load on your back, of feeling like you’re speaking a different language than your staff…
It’s probably time to stop assuming—and start coaching.
π [Click here to reserve your seat in our next GROOW Coaching Workshop]
Let’s lead with intention, not assumption.
Your people—and your school—deserve it.
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